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the problem with this country is that everyone is under the impression that whatever they dream can come true. this is wholly untrue. it’s when we realize this, that anything we dream can be achieved.

Note: this was originally written on february 9, 2004 by me for my friend lance’s website: theregalbeagle.com. i am trying to consolidate my greatest hits on this site. without further ado, another true story by me… It’s funny how memories come back to you. Sometimes they come from so far away that you don’t know [...]

so i was thinking whilst opening the car door for my girlfriend… who the heck invented this move, and why is it considered chivalrous? i then thought that it probably wasn’t thought up with classy intentions after all. the first guy to do it probably just had dinner, and didn’t want to expel post-meal flatulent [...]